Sunday, August 22, 2010

Just plain worn out...

This week has been crazy so much has been going on that I can only barely remember most of it now. Beth has been a hand full this weekend, she hasn't been listening to me very well, but that's ok I knew that she would get to this stage sooner or later, I just hope she grows out of it before the baby is born. I know that shes going to be jealous of the new baby for many various, but I hope that I can help her understand that her sister is a kind of gift, and not some one she should hate, its going to be hard but I know that with the help of my family I can get through it. I finally got all my stuff out of glens storage, actually what happened was I got tired of him dodging me and ignoring my calls about it so I left him a message telling him that I wanted to come get it this week end(while I had some help to get it all) and he showed up the next day with all of it, he even already went through and got all his stuff out of the boxes that had our things mixed...I plan on going through and seeing if anything has been taken that shouldn't have, however I also plan on getting rid of some things as well. I keep having these weird dreams they kind of freak me out a little, and I'm afraid if I talked to any one about them they would either make fun of me, or judge me, or something like that, in my dreams I'm getting ready for a date and my mom keeps asking me who I'm going out with but i just keep saying "you'll see" , when my date finally arrives I open the door, now this is were it gets a little weird, half the time Roger is standing at the door, when hes their mom looks at me stunned for a moment then shakes her head and says "if you think it will work what ever, but take it slow please" we agree and go on our date, the other half of the time Ryan is standing at the door, when its Ryan at the door mom is too shocked to say anything, and we leave to go on our date, now I don't know if that means anything or if its just the stress of life or something like that...if any one knows, I'd appreciate some insightful thought on the dream, any other weird dreams I have are of Danica and I know that those come from my fears and worry's of the pregnancy and what we may or may not have to go through after she is born due to her father, but I can handle that when the time comes. I keeps getting these headaches they just come out of no where, and last for hours then they are gone as fast as they came I don't know what the hell is going on their, I've been thinking about going to my Doctor and asking him what he thinks, but lord only knows what they'll do for me right now. I'm going to mention them to my OBGYN on my appointment on Thursday, but he may not have an answer for me. their has been so much going on with just me, on top of all the stuff going on in the life's of the people around me that I've just gotten to the point where I'm just plain tired a good vacation from the real world would be nice right about now, but I know that life is just gonna get more real in the next few months...just with it would give us all a rest for a min, so we can breath, to bad life doesn't work like that. oh well I guess for now ill just keep hoping for that break in the rain, and when it comes I'm going to enjoy the sun even if its only for a moment.

1 comment:

  1. Well, I can offer insight on the guy dreams, or at least a little. You know, subconsciously, that Roger is a good dad & you want that for both of your daughters & maybe even have some regrets about how it ended with him, so because you're friends with him again, those things come out when you sleep, because you're nervous about the future.

    The one with Ryan is because you know you need someone stable in your life for your girls & he's a pretty stable guy, and you trust him, so your subconscious is telling you to find someone like him, not necessarily him, you know?